A Thousand Tears
by randombitsofnothing
Summary: What if House really did have cancer? Hameron. A new title! Was once, To Be Determined, but now athousandsmiles has named it, bless your soul! Read and Review please.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Not Mine….

The results from his blood work were in and what they had feared most had come to life. He would be dead in less than a year, if that and the deafening silence in the room after she had uttered "positive" attested to that. There was no denying it; the man that they all hated to love was going to die. She looked up to see both Foreman and Chase's head's hung, Chase whispering to himself and Foreman biting his lip. She, on the other hand, could not help the tears that now covered her face, she wouldn't not shed tears for him, she loved him.

"Are you sure?" Foreman asked, lifting his eyes to look at her, all the confirmation he needed in the sadness of her eyes.

"How long does he have?" Chase asked Foreman, already knowing the answer.

"Judging by the size of it and its location, a year, if that." He sighed, both their heads snapping up in the direction of the door when they heard her sob. She was out the door before either could say anything more and they looked to one another, neither making a move towards the door, both needing time to take in the news they had just received.

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Tears ran freely down her face as she drove through Princeton towards his flat. Her stomach was wrenching and her heart breaking at the mere thought of life without him, but knowing that there was still time broke her heart even more. With her first husband there had been little time and a lot of love, with House it was the opposite. A year was double the time she had had with her husband, but House did not return her love, this fact caused her to sob once again as tears continued streaming down her face.

Pulling into a parking spot just outside his flat she killed the engine, attempting in vain to calm herself down. Fifteen minutes passed before she managed to cease the flow of her tears and as she pulled down her sun visor and looked herself over, she considered starting her car and leaving, saving her plans for tomorrow when she could at least look presentable. Her own thought provoked tears to spring into her eyes. '_Times something he doesn't have much of.'_ She thought to herself as she exited her vehicle, forcing herself to remain calm as she knocked on the door to his flat.

Tears returned to her eyes however as a moment later, he opened the door. She stood still and quiet as he gave her a once over before speaking. "I know this must be a major turn on for you. What with the cane and brain cancer and all, but that doesn't mean I'm going to admit to an undying love for you because of it."

"I don't want you too." She told him, crossing her arms over her chest before bringing a hand to her cheek to, what she hoped was nonchalantly, swipe at a tear that had streamed down it.

"What are you doing here?" He asked her, squinting his eyes at her, his gaze sending a hole through the whole of her body and making her fidget. He watched as she took in a deep breath, her chest expanding widely and her words coming out in a jumbled mess.

"I love you." She told him simply. "And it is not the crazy crush that a child would have on its teacher, it's the real thing. Don't ask me why I do because I have asked myself that on a daily basis for the last three years." She began, taking another deep breath before continuing. "I didn't come over here to jump your bones or get a confession of love out of you because I know that your medical state would be the only reason for it." Her next breath was ragged and when he opened his mouth to reply she held her hand up to halt him, tears streaming down her face as she continued, her voice shaky and high pitched. "I know that you have known for a while how I feel about you and it is obvious that those feelings are not reciprocated, but I have never voiced those feelings. I thought that I was over you, I had convinced myself that I was over you, but after reading those test results tonight I realized that I couldn't go another day without telling you how I feel about you. You may think me weak, or a fool, or whatever the hell you want to, but I don't want to look back ten years from now and regret not telling you how I felt." He watched as her chest heaved with her labored breathing and tears continued to stream down her face.

She hiccupped once and looked him in the eye before leaning forward and lightly brushing her lips across his right cheek. What she did not see however was that his eyes closed in response to this as her lips lingered. She moved closer to him and wrapped her arms around him in a right hug, her sobs lost in his chest as tears stained his button down. His eyes remained closed as he felt the pain surging through her body and into his and it was when he lifted his arms to wrap them around her that he caught air, snapping his eyes open to see that she was already halfway to her car with her head hanging low and her sobs echoing through the street.

A/N: No, it's not another installment to either of my other stories, but for some reason this was all that I could write. It could be shit or you could have enjoyed it, but please review to tell me either way. No flames, just well rounded reviews. ;P


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Not Mine….

She sobbed and cried the entire way home, almost losing control of her Cobalt twice and thanking all things holy that traffic was at a minimum this rainy night. Parking in front of her building she placed her hands and head on the steering wheel, letting her tears fall as the rain outside did the same, thunder booming and lightning crackling occasionally as her wind shield wipers worked furiously and her headlights beamed into an unlucky downstairs apartment.

When she exited the vehicle some time later she trudged slowly towards the door to her building, looking up at the sky and cursing a God she didn't believe in for letting something like this happen. In an almost automatic response a large clap of thunder resounded throughout Princeton, immediately followed by a jolt of lightning, causing her to jump and drop her keys on the sidewalk. Standing in place she craned her neck up to the sky, allowing the rain to pour over her face before screaming back at the thunder at the top of her lungs, her efforts overpowered when the thunder resounded once again.

Dropping to her knees she managed to jumble her keys from the ground and pick herself up, exhausted and deflated from the events of this evening and craving nothing but the solitude of her bed. Once inside her apartment she began disposing her soaking clothes to her hardwood floors, not caring about the trail of water that let to her bed room from her soaking wet body, her exhausted body not allowing her to. Once inside the room she sat on the end of the bed, the only light being that of the alarm clock that sat on her beside table and it was soon gone when she grabbed the cord and jerked it from the wall.

Lifting her legs onto the bed she removed the blankets from under her and placed her naked form under them, hearing the thunder clap into the night, but not seeing the lightning that illuminated her room every five minutes. Her body continued to remain cold under the warmth of the blankets, her body numb and shaking. Her tears finally stilled some half an hour later and sleep finally managed to over come her, her last thought being of him.

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He lit a cigarette as he sat outside her apartment in his Corvette, her words still resounding in his head and causing an involuntary shiver to run through his body. The warmth of his body in the chilling car caused his windows to steam up, the smoke from the cigarette aiding it until he could no longer see outside it. In another six hours he would be boarding a plane to the hospital where he would get his first and final round of treatment, the prolonged effects promising him a pain free life until the day he died.

He would have to resign as Head of Diagnostics, the meds in the treatment would force his brain to retreat and it would not work like it did now, there would be no medical puzzles to solve, no differentials, no white board, no mocking of the wombat on a daily basis. The news had immediately brought these facts to light and he had been apprehensive to consent to the treatment. Vicodin barely dulled the pain in his leg however, and no amount of pain killers would be able to keep him from the pain of this cancer, his already damaged body would but his life expectancy in half, he had to do it. He would still be Gregory House, but no longer would he be Gregory House, M.D., and this was what he would miss the most.

'_She had to go and tell me that she loves me, she had to make this more difficult than it already is.' _He thought. To know and it and to show it were two entirely different things and he knew as he sat outside her apartment that he was doomed to love her, and not in a bad way. She was right when she had said that he had known it, he knew since the monster truck show that she loved him, and he had discovered on their date that he did indeed love her. It had started as a small, nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach, mostly because of guilt after the date. He had felt guilty for being so unkind to her, for being as blunt as he had been.

But the gnawing grew, he no longer dreaded her long looks of longing she gave him, but encouraged them. When in the lab he would brush up against her and read results over her shoulder, making sure that his breathing was hard enough to reach her neck. When she handed him a cup of coffee every morning he made sure that his hand brushed hers and held it for a moment longer than necessary. The night she had worn that damn red dress he had not be ashamed to be appreciative of the way she looked, and every day he gave her an appreciative once over and nod. Her temper rose at him a few times and she matched wits with him as her time in the fellowship increased, she had become someone he could depend on, someone he looked forward to seeing every day, he did love her.

With his bags packed and in the trunk of his car he knew that he had five and a half hours and a pack of Marlboro to work up the nerve to prove it.

A/N: Please review….


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks go out to all of those who reviewed these first couple of chapters. I am having an inner debate about changing the end of this story which I had in mind. I guess we'll see as the story progresses….

Disclaimer: The show unfortunately is not mine. But my plan is that while the writer's are on strike, to burn any ideas that they once had, replace them with my own script, and have Cameron and House hot and sweaty for an entire hour….only in a perfect world.

It took another half hour and six cigarettes before he found himself walking into her building. While he would be resigning his position at Princeton Plainsboro and there would be no superior/subordinate rendezvous, he did not want her to think that he was only there because he was dying. When he stepped off onto her floor his steps were slow, and not just because of his leg, but doubt crowded his mind and his second thoughts reemerged.

When he stood in front of her door and lifted his cane to knock her face immediately popped into his mind. Only five hours ago she stood in front of him, looking so broken, so conflicted and professed her love for him. What would she say to him when she answered the door, would his being there finish her off, break her in half? Or would it heal her, allow her the comfort of knowing that he did love her and that he did not want to part from this earth without knowing her love. He wanted to hold her, to kiss her, to cherish her, to hold her so tight that no one would be able to distinguish where one began and the other ended. With that thought he allowed his cane to thump against the door, once, twice, three times, each thump harder than the first, the sound of wood on wood echoing throughout the hall and probably waking up half of the occupants of the floor.

He waited impatiently for her to answer his calls, bringing his cane to the floor and hitting the butt of his cane against the floor, a nervous habit. When it became apparent that she had not heard him he pulled his keys from his jeans pocket, finding her key almost immediately and pushing it into the lock and opening the door. The apartment was dark, a blast of lightning illuminating his way as he closed the door and locked it behind him. Limping silently through her apartment he came to her bedroom door that she had left open, looking at her sleeping form.

Lifting his cane to rest it on his forearm he moved into the room, resting his body in the chair that sat next to her bed. Settling in he debated on whether or not to wake her. Moisture lingered on her face and he could tell that even in her sleep she was crying for him and his body ached to touch her, to wrap his arms around her and never let go. He managed to contain himself, contemplating whether or not he should wake her. He decided to watch her sleep, his eyes watching her chest as it rose and fell underneath the blanket. He gasped aloud when her arm came up to pull the covers off her shoulders. He averted his eyes then, catching the sight of the clothes she had been wearing soaking in water on the floor beside the bed, she was indeed naked under the sheets.

Bringing his eyes back to her face he saw another tear roll down her cheek, his resolve breaking and his body beginning to stand. It was then that a loud clap of thunder resounded throughout the apartment and she shot up in the bed. Letting himself fall back into the cushion of his sheet he watched as she held her blanket to her chest, her head moving to her left to check her window before moving back his direction. "Cameron." He spoke, grimacing when she shrieked and pulled her body to the other side of the bed, clearly frightened.

"House?" She asked, her eyes squinting to adjust to his dark figure sitting in her chair. He moved to click on the lamp beside of him and she squinted more as her eyes settled on him. It was when he saw her face that he felt his heart wrench and burst into a million pieces, her forehead was creased in confusion and her eyes were puffy, she hadn't stopped crying. "What….are y-you doing here?" She asked, holding her bed clothes closer to her body.

"You left." He answered simply, his eyes pleading, causing her forehead to crease even more in confusion. He watched as she looked to her clock.

"You only have four-" She began.

"I don't want to talk about that." He interrupted; pulling his body up from his seat and propping his cane up on the arm of the chair, taking a step and lifting the blankets to sit on the bed, his back against the headboard beside her. With shaky hands he reached under her blankets and grasped her hips, feeling her gasp of surprise when he lifted her and pulled her in front of him, his arms wrapping around her naked waist and pulling her naked form against his damp clothes. She gasped at the feel of his warmth through the cold clothes as he placed one leg on either side of her thighs, turning her on her side and pulling her head to his chest, her right ear resting over his heart. Settling his hands on her hips he moved his left hand to find her right, covering her hand with his. "Do you hear that?" He asked her.

"Of course I do." She whispered, her words coming out shakily. Her body was tense against his, as if she was afraid and he kissed her hair before grasping her hand and maneuvering them under his shirt, resting her hand on his bare chest near her ear, his hand laying hers flat and covering it.

"Do you feel that?" He asked her.

"House, what's this-"

"Just answer me." He told her, both surprised by his soothing tone of voice.

"Yes." She answered simply, looking up at him, her head still resting on his chest.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"I'm positive." 

"It beats for you." He told her and remained silent for a moment, she could hear the words forming in his chest before he vocalized them. "That rapid pace you are experiencing right now is there with the mere thought of your face. My heart longs for you and it has for a long time, you are my heart. As long as it beats, as long as I breathe, it is yours." Even with his clothes being damp he could feel her tears soaking his t-shirt, her breath quickening as he continued. "Seeing you on my step today, hearing you tell me that you loved me…I could feel your love for me when you spoke. I don't want you because I am dying, and I know that you don't want me for that reason either. There is no other way for me to prove that I love you other than this, I am not here because I am dying. Now, I'm going to ask you one last time….do you feel that?"

A/N: REVIEW please.


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